Actually there are five. There were only going to be three taken out at first but when they read the book again, the British publishers, still got frightened so they cut out two more.

Flat Cat Dad drove over the cat last week; He was old and deaf and fast asleep And so was the cat. But poor old Pussy did not deserve What he got when Dad didn't swerve And now he's a mat.

Tiger, Tiger Burning Bright Tiger, tiger burning bright Who the hell set you alight?

The Cleanest Cat In The World Our cat fell asleep in the washing machine And now he's the cleanest that he's ever been. Don't try this at home. This has to be said. For as well as dead clean, he's also clean dead.

Piranhas Piranhas in pajamas Would be a lot more fun Than boring old bananas Let’s hear it for P1. Piranhas in pajamas Would like to play with you And eat up all your arms and legs Let’s hear it for P2.

The Mayfly The Mayfly is the stupidest Of all the little flies It hatches out without a mouth So pretty quickly dies.

Author's notes - If your head has exploded, go straight to an adult and ask for two aspirins and a big bandage. Keep away from tigers with boxes of matches. Always check under the car for sleeping cats. (Flat Cat is my favourite poem in the whole book and I wrote it to cheer up a friend of my daughter who's poor old cat actually did get squashed by her dad) NEVER put things that breathe into washing machines, except geography teachers.